It took an hour to get home from work tonight. 795 was a fucking parking lot, and so I went down to Liberty Road.<\/p>\n
I hate Liberty Road.<\/p>\n
Bumper to bumper. Stoplights. Stupid drivers pulling out into traffic.<\/p>\n
I saw a 7-11. After an hour on the road, I thought I deserved a Slurpee.<\/p>\n
I grabbed a cup. I affixed the lid.<\/p>\n
Banana!<\/p>\n
I turned the knob.<\/p>\n
And what came out?<\/p>\n
Pure. Syrup.<\/p>\n
I turned the knob. Shut off the flow. I looked around.<\/p>\n
And then I filled the cup. All the way to the top.<\/p>\n
Pure! Slurpee! Syrup!<\/p>\n
Wow!<\/p>\n
One observation. Pure Slurpee syrup burns as it goes down.<\/p>\n
I wonder what it would be like, if mixed with vodka.<\/p>\n
Wow!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It took an hour to get home from work tonight. 795 was a fucking parking lot, and so I went down to Liberty Road. I hate Liberty Road. Bumper to bumper. Stoplights. Stupid drivers pulling out into traffic. I saw a 7-11. After an hour on the road, I thought I deserved a Slurpee. IContinue reading “On Slurpee Goodness”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65],"tags":[474],"class_list":["post-1487","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-banana","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1487","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1487"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1487\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1487"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1487"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1487"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}