{"id":2187,"date":"2009-02-06T19:44:11","date_gmt":"2009-02-07T00:44:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.net\/?p=2187"},"modified":"2009-02-06T19:44:11","modified_gmt":"2009-02-07T00:44:11","slug":"on-my-annual-report-to-the-head-beagle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/?p=2187","title":{"rendered":"On My Annual Report to the Head Beagle"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Recently, I picked up Fantagraphics <i>The Complete Peanuts<\/i> Volume 10, which covers the adventures of Charlie Brown and the gang from 1969 and 1970.<\/p>\n<p>I was flipping through it leisurely, and on January 4, 1970, Snoopy received his annual questionnaire from the Head Beagle.<\/p>\n<p>Without further ado, here&#8217;s my annual report to Head Beagle on my 2008:<\/p>\n<p><b>1. How many rabbits have you chased?<\/b><br \/>I saw one in the yard in April.  I gave chase, because it was there.  I didn&#8217;t catch it.  It definitely eluded me.<\/p>\n<p><b>2. How many cats have you chased?<\/b><br \/>One cat, multiple times.  Most often, it&#8217;s when the cat is being stupid; he wants to come inside, but then he won&#8217;t come in, so I go outside to fetch him, and then he decides it&#8217;s time to play.  Again, the cat eluded me on these multiple occasions.<\/p>\n<p><b>3. How many owls did you howl at?<\/b><br \/>None.  I haven&#8217;t seen an owl this year.  If I had seen an owl, I probably would have said, &#8220;Well, fuck me sideways, it&#8217;s an owl!&#8221; rather than howl at it.<\/p>\n<p><b>4. Did you take part in any fox hunts?<\/b><br \/>I thought fox hunts were illegal in many parts of the world.<\/p>\n<p><b>5. Relationships with humans&#8230;<br \/>a. How did you treat your master?<\/b><br \/>I have good working relationships with my colleagues at the office.<br \/><b>b. Were you friendly to neighborhood children?<\/b><br \/>I wave at them in the mornings, on the occasions that I see them.  I had comic books for them on Halloween, if only they had come to my door.<br \/><b>c. Did you bite anyone?<\/b><br \/>I should hope not!<\/p>\n<p>That, my friends, is 2008 in a nutshell.  I chased cats and rabbits.  I didn&#8217;t see an owl.  Nor did I sink my teeth into anyone.<\/p>\n<p>How was your 2008 by comparison?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Recently, I picked up Fantagraphics The Complete Peanuts Volume 10, which covers the adventures of Charlie Brown and the gang from 1969 and 1970. I was flipping through it leisurely, and on January 4, 1970, Snoopy received his annual questionnaire from the Head Beagle. Without further ado, here&#8217;s my annual report to Head Beagle on<a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/?p=2187\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">&#8220;On My Annual Report to the Head Beagle&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[104],"tags":[4107,4099,4100],"class_list":["post-2187","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-memes","tag-memes","tag-peanuts","tag-snoopy","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2187","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2187"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2187\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2187"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2187"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2187"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}