{"id":577,"date":"2005-09-23T23:40:52","date_gmt":"2005-09-24T04:40:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.net\/?p=577"},"modified":"2005-09-23T23:40:52","modified_gmt":"2005-09-24T04:40:52","slug":"on-life-as-a-sine-wave","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/?p=577","title":{"rendered":"On Life as a Sine Wave"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Life is a sine wave.  When it goes up, it goes <i>way<\/i> up.  When it goes down, it goes <i>way<\/i> down.  And from one extreme to another.<\/p>\n<p>Take yesterday.  I stopped at the post office before work.  I walked across the parking lot, and as I stepped into the lane of traffic along the post office a car stopped as I crossed.  Then, as I stepped onto the curb the car stopped behind me, and the driver inside, a woman to judge by her voice, yelled &#8220;Asshole!&#8221;  I couldn&#8217;t see where <i>that<\/i> was coming from.<\/p>\n<p>Busy day at work, and we&#8217;d taken in a lot of trade-ins.  Toward the end of the day a regular came in with his son, and they wanted trade-in values on a bag of PC games.  Checking the trade-in values on PC games isn&#8217;t easy&#8211;usually people don&#8217;t keep their boxes, so instead of simply scanning the bar code there&#8217;s a fair bit of text searching to perform.  As I went through the bag the customer asked me how long I&#8217;d been at my store.  Four, five years? he said.  Actually, only three&#8211;I moved down to Raleigh from Philadelphia three years ago last week.  He wanted to know how the move had worked out for me, and we talked vaguely of the laid-back, relaxed nature of the area.  In the end, his son decided not to trade the games&#8211;I could take only half of the ones he&#8217;d brought in, and for those ten games he was averaging a quarter of store credit each.  He and his son left, I locked up the store, and a wave of depression rolled across me.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m great with faces.  I&#8217;m terrible with names.  I see this customer in my store at least twice a month.  I have no idea what his name is.  Or the name of his son.<\/p>\n<p>But that wasn&#8217;t what depressed me.<\/p>\n<p>The conversation we had turned my thoughts back to the store I managed in the Philadelphia suburbs, to the employees I had on my team, to the regular customers I had then.  I wondered what became of some of them.  And that made me sad.<\/p>\n<p>One of my regulars in Pennsylvania&#8211;we&#8217;ll take him as an example.  Mid-fifties.  Had a son, eleven or twelve.  Custody of his son every other weekend.  Didn&#8217;t work, <i>couldn&#8217;t<\/i> work.  He had Hepatitus, if memory serves.  Sickly, frail.  We didn&#8217;t get along at first for reasons that escape memory, but I earned his trust and respect one day when I said, flatly, that I wouldn&#8217;t sell him a game because it sucked and his son would be disappointed in it.  At that point he realized that it wasn&#8217;t about the money for me&#8211;I wanted his son to be happy with his games.  After that he&#8217;d call me most every afternoon and talk for at least half an hour about how rotten his life was, how badly his ex-wife treated his son, how important his son was to him, about the things he wanted to do for his son and couldn&#8217;t because of his situation.  I didn&#8217;t have the time for these phone calls, I don&#8217;t know if he ever understand the demands of time and empathy the calls made upon me, and I realized in time that he had reached out to me because I <i>listened<\/i> when no one else did.  A sense of community, of belonging, the phone calls had that effect.<\/p>\n<p>My last day in Pennsylvania, we had a party at the store.  My regulars knew I was leaving, moving to Raleigh, so on the last day most all of them came by.  This customer came over, with his son, and I got his address.  I promised I&#8217;d mail him once I&#8217;d gotten settled in Raleigh.  I sent him a Christmas card that year and never heard anything back.<\/p>\n<p>I hadn&#8217;t really thought about him at any serious length until, well, last night.  And just thinking about the things I didn&#8217;t know, that made me feel sad inside.  I thought of that last day in Pennsylvania and the happy moments, and then came the sadness from not knowing how the people I knew there turned out and the realization that I&#8217;ll probably never know.<\/p>\n<p>Great things happen in life.  Bad things happen, too.  Life brings euphoria and sadness.  It&#8217;s the up-and-down, the sine wave of life washing across the consciousness.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Life is a sine wave. When it goes up, it goes way up. When it goes down, it goes way down. And from one extreme to another. Take yesterday. I stopped at the post office before work. I walked across the parking lot, and as I stepped into the lane of traffic along the post<a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/?p=577\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">&#8220;On Life as a Sine Wave&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65],"tags":[228,4093,4124],"class_list":["post-577","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-eb-games","tag-life","tag-work","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=577"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=577"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=577"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.allyngibson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=577"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}