On the Day After

I was planning on writing nothing more on the subject of Sarah Palin and her sudden resignation, at least until the federal indictments are handed down in the very near future, but I can’t stand to watch the bloodbath in Wrigleyville any longer.

Oh, Cubs :cubs: , why hast thou forsaken me?


Sarah Palin.

The transcript of her resignation speech makes for some fascinating reading. So, too, does the original version that was posted on Alaska’s website, until they cleaned up the text of its grammatical problems.

Of course, the best line of either version has to be, and I quote:

*((Gotta put First Things First))*

Yes, that is an actual line, from an actual transcript, of an actual speech, given by an actual politician.

No, I have never seen a comma I didn’t like. But that’s neither here nor there.

Paul Begala, a former Clinton insider and the author of a number of anti-Bush books that I have read, has a wonderful response to Palin’s speech. I am particularly taken by this passage:

Her statement was incoherent, bizarre and juvenile. The text, as posted on Gov. Palin’s official website (here), uses 2,549 words and 18 exclamation points. Lincoln freed the slaves with 719 words and nary an exclamation; Mr. Jefferson declared our independence in 1,322 words and, again, no exclamation points. Nixon resigned the presidency in 1,796 words — still no exclamation points. Gov. Palin capitalized words at random – whole words, like “TO,” “HELP,” and “AND,” and the first letter of “Troops.”

Gov. Palin’s official announcement that she is resigning as chief executive of the great state of Alaska had all the depth and gravitas of a 13-year-old’s review of the Jonas Brothers’ album on Facebook. She even quoted her parents’ refrigerator magnet. (Note to self: if one of my kids becomes governor, throw away the refrigerator magnet that says: “Murray’s Oyster Bar: We Shuck Em, You Suck Em!”) She put her son’s name in quotations marks. Why? Who knows. She writes, “I promised efficiencies and effectiveness!?” Was she exclaiming or questioning? I get it: both!

I should stipulate that I have no idea who the Jonas Brothers are.

Andrew Sullivan may have said it best:

In the end, I think, the one thing to say is that the Republican party is in such a total state of collapse and incoherence that it actually believed she could be a future president; and that John McCain was so reckless, so cynical and so cavalier that he was prepared to rest the national security of this country on her shoulders if he, in his seventies, were to become unable to fulfill his duties or die. In some ways, this is a moment to reflect on McCain, and his irresponsibility, not Palin and her drama.

History dodged a bullet last autumn.

Published by Allyn

A writer, editor, journalist, sometimes coder, occasional historian, and all-around scholar, Allyn Gibson is the writer for Diamond Comic Distributors' monthly PREVIEWS catalog, used by comic book shops and throughout the comics industry, and the editor for its monthly order forms. In his over ten years in the industry, Allyn has interviewed comics creators and pop culture celebrities, covered conventions, analyzed industry revenue trends, and written copy for comics, toys, and other pop culture merchandise. Allyn is also known for his short fiction (including the Star Trek story "Make-Believe,"the Doctor Who short story "The Spindle of Necessity," and the ReDeus story "The Ginger Kid"). Allyn has been blogging regularly with WordPress since 2004.

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