On My Grandmother’s Car

My grandmother’s boat of a car is gone.

It was a mid-90s Ford Crown Victoria. No, scratch that. I’ve just looked at pictures. It was a late-80s Crown Victoria, probably about 1986 or 1987.

I don’t know the last time my grandmother drove it. She didn’t drive it after summer 2005. That’s when the transmission in it blew out on the Delaware Memorial Bridge; my mom took my grandmother to Atlantic City that summer, and she insisted they take her car. My parents occassionally drove it after that (the transmission was replaced, obviously), but it hasn’t moved from the driveway since 2007.

In 2007, my dad had the ignition changed so she couldn’t start it, and he kept the keys someplace where she’d never find them — in his car. She would occasionally go outside and look at the car. She’d touch it, and she wouldn’t notice the dirt and grime as it built up. Not long after my dad had the ignition changed, she popped the hood and insisted that someone had stolen the car battery. She threatened to call the police. It sounds amusing, but it really wasn’t.

The Crown Victoria is in the Google Maps pictures of the house, which were dated to November 2007. (There are three Christmas wreaths on the front of the house, and the house that was torn down across the street a few years ago is still standing.) It’s also in the overhead view, which I’m going to say was sometime in summer 2010 (based on things like the foliage and the house standing across the street).

It sat so long in the same place in the parking lot that it actually caused the asphalt in the driveway to sink. There are four tire-shaped ruts in the driveway where the boat sat.

It was towed away today. It’s gone.

I won’t miss it.

Published by Allyn

A writer, editor, journalist, sometimes coder, occasional historian, and all-around scholar, Allyn Gibson is the writer for Diamond Comic Distributors' monthly PREVIEWS catalog, used by comic book shops and throughout the comics industry, and the editor for its monthly order forms. In his over ten years in the industry, Allyn has interviewed comics creators and pop culture celebrities, covered conventions, analyzed industry revenue trends, and written copy for comics, toys, and other pop culture merchandise. Allyn is also known for his short fiction (including the Star Trek story "Make-Believe,"the Doctor Who short story "The Spindle of Necessity," and the ReDeus story "The Ginger Kid"). Allyn has been blogging regularly with WordPress since 2004.

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