On the Need for Pirates

It’s hot. It’s really hot. This is no mere heat wave. This is global warming, pure and simple. There’s only one thing to be done, really. High seas piracy. Where are the pirates stepping up to the plate, to sacrifice their lives, liberty, and sacred honor on the high seas? Where are the men ofContinue reading “On the Need for Pirates”

On January Weather

The ninth of January shouldn’t feel like spring. Yesterday, temperatures in Charm City reached the mid-seventies. Right now, as I write this, it’s about sixty-five. It’s drizzly. It’s windy. It’s sixty-five. On January 9th. Yesterday, the grounds crew were hard at work at the office, mowing the lawn. It was odd to see guys andContinue reading “On January Weather”

On Piracy and Global Warming

It’s too blooming hot. The government needs to do something. Global warming isn’t something that can be ignored. Al Gore has shown us the light. But what can be done? Perhaps we should encourage high-seas piracy! Pastafarians, followers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, believe that “global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are aContinue reading “On Piracy and Global Warming”