This morning, I ventured out to the Post Office. I had to mail some packages for Christmas, and I wanted to get my Christmas cards in the mail. I thought about going into Randallstown, but they have a small, difficult-to-navigate parking lot. Eldersburg, I decided, would be easier to get to. I expected, since itContinue reading “On Leesburg’s Christmas Controversy”
On occasion, I have completely mental thoughts. Take last Friday, for instance. After the every-few-monthly pub outing with the department I, while somewhat intoxicated, wrote the following sentence: “Imagine a world without fractions.” I don’t know what that means. I can’t imagine a world without fractions. Yet, I worked that sentence into a Sherlock HolmesContinue reading “On Madcap Ideas”
Amazing! The Flying Spaghetti Monster was sighted in Germany, perched atop a rather garish looking building. Will wonders never cease!
It’s hot. It’s really hot. This is no mere heat wave. This is global warming, pure and simple. There’s only one thing to be done, really. High seas piracy. Where are the pirates stepping up to the plate, to sacrifice their lives, liberty, and sacred honor on the high seas? Where are the men ofContinue reading “On the Need for Pirates”
Avast, ye maties! Ahoy, ye lasses! Arr, today be International Talk Like a Pirate Day! Lest Long John Silver make ye walk the plank and swim the briny deep with the fishes, greet ye friends and mateys with the lingo! Steal from the libretto of The Pirates of Penzance. Watch the movies with Captain JackContinue reading “On Talk Like a Pirate Day”
This occurred to me at work today. Might the Flying Spaghetti Monster be one of the Elder Gods? Consider. Pastafarians bless one another with the saying, “May you be touched by His Noodly Appendage.” Conventionally, we think of the Noodly Appendage as, well, pasta. Could it actually be a tentacle? Could the pasta merely beContinue reading “On a Pastafarian Insight”
September 19th is Talk Like a Pirate Day, a day in which scallywags are allowed to be silly and liberally sprinke their vocabulary with an “Aye, matey,” and “Arr, ye scurvy sea dog,” and “Avast and ahoy!” Perhaps, to a Pastafarian Talk Like a Pirate Day should be mark some sort of religious festival. OneContinue reading “On Talk Like a Pirate Day”
It’s too blooming hot. The government needs to do something. Global warming isn’t something that can be ignored. Al Gore has shown us the light. But what can be done? Perhaps we should encourage high-seas piracy! Pastafarians, followers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, believe that “global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are aContinue reading “On Piracy and Global Warming”